CANDY WASHINGTON

WRITER | PRODUCER | ACTOR | MANIFESTATION + SELF-LOVE MUSE

Glop: A Goop Parody for the Everyday Girl by Gabrielle Moss

Candy WashingtonComment

Hi lovelies,

The New Year is officially in full swing and one thing on my 'Live Your Best Life Now' resolutions list is to laugh more and to try new things. Luckily for me, I have Gabrielle Moss' book, Glop, to help keep me on track.

The hilarious book is a light-hearted spoof on Gwyneth Paltrow's lifestyle site, Goop. Although I'm a huge fan of Gwyneth Paltrow, Gabrielle Moss' adaptation of Goop, has something for everyone and appeals to a broader audience because it takes the super seriousness out of “finding our purpose and balance in life” and allows us to just laugh at ourselves while we run from a pliates-barre class to a vaginal steaming session, all while on a gluten-free-paleo-coconut-oil-steamed-everything-planted-based diet.

3 Favorite Glop Experiences:

#1: Sitting Very Still & Staring Blankly Ahead: A 21-Day Plan
One of my top New Year's resolutions is to take the time to meditate for at least 15 minutes everyday and I have to admit, taking the time to set an intention for the day and calm my mind has already been a game changer in my life.

However, Gabrielle's take on meditating includes having a stress intern that writes down all of your stressful thoughts and I can't lie, I'm seriously thinking of employing my 12 year old niece to be my stress intern as I continue my journey of decluttering my head space.

#2: Ultra-Refined Vibrance Powder Detox
I've been a pescatarian for awhile now but I'm always on the hunt for new ways to eat healthier and to rid my body of any unwanted toxins and impurities. If real, Gabrielle's Ultra-Refined Vibrance Powder Detox would have been the perfect addition to my diet to make sure that's full of fairy dustand leaves me light as a feather and stiff as a board.

#3: How to Leonardo DiCaprio Know That Your Carbon Footprint Is Smaller Than HisWell, I'm single, and this one is totally gratuitous and shameless plug to have the opportunity to talk about Leonardo DiCaprio. And in the spirit of Gabrielle's super funny and witty writing and personality, Leo, if you're out there, hit a girl up and let's talk global warming, melting ice caps, and fracking.

About the Book: A wickedly funny, full-color, illustrated sendup of the trendy lifestyle publication GOOP.

What is Glop?
Glop is a business and a website. But Glop is also a feeling. It’s about picking the right expensive organic eye cream that will make you fit seamlessly into the top tiers of high society and sits next to Bono at a 42-course seitan tasting dinner held in a sex dungeon deep beneath the North Pole. Glop is about being conscious to the tiny details of our lives—what to eat, where to buy your cashmere yoga pants, which juice cleanse will remove the most mercury toxins from both your body and your cashmere yoga pants. Glop is about you.

In this scathingly humorous parody, Gabrielle Moss skewers the vanity, elitism, and silliness of the lifestyle website everyone loves to hate. Here are favorite recipes, detoxes, activities, cleanses, beauty tips, juice cleanses, vacation destinations, and a selection of hand creams that will open your third eye—plus lots of celebrity namedropping and more.

Glop includes everything from the silly to sublime—make-at-home stem cell moisturizing repair masques, weekend colonics, restorative yoga poses (for when Sting is mad at you about that thing you did), and even the freshest bones for your bone broth. Here, too, are G’s essential tips on parenthood, relationships, work and finances, entertaining, food (well, maybe not food), spirituality, beauty, fashion, home, gifts, kids, and more. Nothing in Glop is sacred—except for a few Indian cows you can’t afford.